Oh, don't mind me just sitting here on the floor of an empty apartment trying to process the past five days... Graduation weekend is officially done and now I am a post graduate. All my friends have left and my roommate as well. My family left later yesterday but I quickly busied myself with packing so as not to linger too long on all the things I should be sad about.
The emphasis here is really on the fact that I SHOULD BE sad right now. Instead I feel unemotional (and if you really knew me you would find this terribly confusing). I am a pro at being overly emotional. I can cry on command and tend to get heartbroken from even the most menial of situations. But I'm sitting here waiting for tears to come and they haven't.
On graduation day I cried once for about five minutes as I hugged all my dearest friends goodbye. All of us caught up in the whirlwind of graduation, introducing parents to friends and friends to siblings etc etc. As we cabbed to the hotel I didn't feel upset knowing that when I returned to the apartment there would be no one there. Saying goodbye to my parents as they had an early flight, no tears. Walking across the Brooklyn Bridge with my sisters knowing it would be my last time walking around the city for a long long time, no tears. And even now as I have come to the full realization that it is over I can't cry.
Maybe I really did do a good job at prepping myself for the end. I am happy that I was never distant and right to the last minute my friends and I knew how much we loved each other and how special this time together has really been.
Actually, I think the part I'm most upset about is that I couldn't fit everything in my three pieces of luggage (shipping things from NYC is completely the bane of my existence). I'll be heading to a friends home in Long Island and then leaving Thursday night for California. So I suppose this will be my last post written in New York. As some parting remarks I just want to thank this city for being my escape. Thanks to Manhattan College for teaching me more than just education, the value of friendship. And thank you to this incredible experience that *even though I'm not crying* is heart-wrenching to believe that it has finally come to a close.
XOXO from New York Sam!

So as of right now Adventures in the City that Never Sleeps has sadly come to an end. We are now entering the era of "The Leg Up" (more on what this name means to me later). It has been something I've been thinking about for awhile now and I finally decided to put it into action. I have to say it is a little invigorating to have something you created changing its name after such a long time.
When I started the blog I was in the second semester of my first year of college. At first all I wanted was to document some things that went on in my life. Almost like a scrap book of my ideas and adventures with friends during this crazy college experience. For the most part I would post like once every four months and even stopped altogether for awhile as different things kept capturing my attention.
It wasn't until recently that I started blogging about products, routines, and other things in my life that I enjoy and wanted to share with the blogging community. For me it has never been about getting a bunch of readers but just as a place where I could publicly share some of the goings-on in the life of a twenty-something who was living far away from home.
Another part of this "rebranding" is that in a few short weeks (almost like 50 days?!?!) I will be leaving New York City. I have grown accustomed to making tiny changes in preparation for big life changes. For the most part I compartmentalize change by making sure it goes in increments. This could be anywhere from how I'm going to move my stuff back across the country to should I dye my hair before I graduate or right after to signal the next step.
April, I can already tell, is going to be the pivotal month of this new experience. School work is manageable, retail work is manageable, friendships are manageable. But there are so many tiny details that need to be finished before May 22nd (my graduation day) and June 1st (the day I move back to California). The job search is what it is and surprisingly I am handling the stress of this remarkably well even though I have only gotten responses from companies that I don't really see myself fitting into. I will be *reluctantly* moving home until I can save up for a deposit on an apartment and I am already making plans for later in the year to travel with old friends.
It's really crazy to be having such an adjustment after I literally feel like I just moved here. The apartment feels like home and I can remember back to last May where I couldn't imagine having to live in such a tiny place for what seemed like a very very VERY long year.
So I guess that's what The Leg Up is doing for me. It's just one of the thousands of changes I am making before the next step. This path of education is coming to a very swift ending, one that I have really only mentally prepared for these past few months.
Some of you may be asking "Why the leg up?"
Well obviously, if I haven't said before, I am quite tall and I thought it would be fun to do a play on words for the new title. The idiom - getting a leg up - is like getting a boost from life. That's what I want this blog to be for this new phase. For the readers, for myself, for whomever may come across it. I think we could all use some support (even support as common as what new makeup to buy at the drugstore).
So thanks for sticking around and welcome to The Leg Up! As always xoxo Sam

I always try to be a self-proclaimed laid back kinda gal. However, mama does love a routine. Whether its just the first 20 minutes after I wake up, it's typically the time when I try to stick to routine the most. If I can start my morning off the right way, I find it usually makes for a better afternoon.
I can describe the routine as:

• Wake up and check all the apps on my phone that would be refreshed/new in the morning (10 Minutes)
• Go to the restroom, brush my teeth and wash my face (5 min)
• Come out to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee and pour cereal (2 min)
• Make sure my budget book is as up-to-date as possible (more on this later, trying to keep a written book of everything I buy to see my spending habits) (5 to 10 min)
• Grab my computer and check all the different websites that have also been refreshed/new in the morning (20-30 min) 
• total time: 42-55 minutes

I bleed at the thought that I never update this blog but of course here I am to fill in the latest and greatest news. Lately things of been tough. Not just the normal day-to-day stresses of school and friends but also internally. I felt like I started off the year with a clean mindset and here I am, March, and I can feel myself reverting back to old ways. I don't like complaining because my life really has a lot of wonderful things about it! But sometimes it just gets to be too much.
I know pretty much every twentysomething can relate to the feeling of being lost. Do I love my major? no. Am I ready to start my life? yes. Am I ready to take on adult responsibilities? uhh...
All of these things are constantly swirling around our minds and eventually it just gets to be too much and you want to run away as fast as possible from everything and everyone.
There are moments that make it worth it, like walking in New York Fashion Week, but more often than not there are moments where you think... what am I actually doing with my life. Sure everyone says we have time but I don't want to waste the one life we are given just being unhappy with who I am and what I'm doing.
I guess I came here to say I am done with the city that never sleeps. I am tired. I am broke. And I am flailing.
With that said I am not depressed about life. I know there is so much more the world has to offer me. Maybe it's because I am figuring out who I am and what I want that I am unsatisfied with the life that I am living at this moment. It definitely doesn't mean I won't ever get away from it because come spring of 2016 ADIOS NEW YORK!
I will always appreciate the time I have spent here and the memories I have shared with some amazing people. But it's time for something different. Some people are empowered by New York and I honestly envy their tenacity and courage.
We get out what we put in to life. Maybe I didn't put enough of myself into loving it here. Maybe I was someone who was meant for a different path and didn't know until I learned for myself. But I think that is the great thing about leaving. That now I can go back and know what the world was like away from the support and comfort of home.
But then again... maybe it's the fact that it is almost April and there is currently snow falling from the sky. Or maybe I just have a chronic dissatisfaction with life (love quoting woody allen movies). I wish some wise old sage could come and tell me that I made the right choice. That I didn't screw up by choosing to go so far away from home. That New York was where I was meant to find myself.
I didn't know this post would turn into such a bummer but I needed to express to others that you aren't alone if you feel like you made the wrong choice. You aren't alone if you don't love the life you are living. And you aren't alone if you are ready to make the changes necessary to be a happier person.
I am tired of putting on a brave face for everyone and acting like its all flowers and rainbows.
Okay... Angsty rant over.

Wow I really suck at keeping updated on things. Well life here in Spain is pretty amazing. The people I have met and become friends with are truly amazing. The places I have seen are absolutely breathtaking. And the food I have eaten has unmatched anything I have ever had before. I wouldn´t trade a moment of this adventure because it has truly been one of the greatest experiences of my entire life.
But... and I don´t mean the negative but... I really miss New York. Prior to arriving in Spain I was feeling kind of iffy about returning to MC. Not because I didn´t love the city or my amazing friends but because I was tired of leaving my family back in California. All I wanted was to be close to my mom and cousins and uncles and aunts and grandparents and dog (lol). I even broke down in the London airport when I realized I was tired of saying goodbye all the time. It never gets easier and really it gets harder with the passing of time. People are getting older and their lives are changing and often, when you aren´t present, those plans don´t include you.
When I first got to Spain I was pretty upset. I wasn´t adjusting well to the culture and I was angry with myself for making this choice. Then a few weeks ago I started to really really REALLY miss MC. I wanted to walk the same path to Leo. I wanted to get a chai latte and sweet potatoe fries from Café 1853. I even missed the cafetería food from Lockes. I don´t necessarily know what made this change of heart but it has constantly been on my mind and it is exhausting.
It is really difficult to miss a place when you have no way of changing it. Then I get angry at myself for not living in the moment. I will never get the chance to live in Spain again and here I am missing a place that I could probably live for the rest of my life. I am here with my best friend and sister and Jesus I must be absolutely insane!!!!!
But I´m not. I am human and often times don´t have control over what my mind desires or my heart wants. I think it is cheesy when people say ´´ Oh it helped me learn so much about myself´´ but really I have found out that maybe i´m not as adventurous as  I once believed. I was always someone who believed the grass was greener somewhere else but honestly going to New York was my biggest dream and for a moment I was ready to throw in the towel and call it quits. I am grateful this experience has renewed this love that I have but when January 5th rolls around... I won´t be sorry or sad or unprepared.
I will be able to say I did it. Against all odds I did something that most people in their life will never do. I will also be able to say I am doing EXACTLY what I wanted to do with my life.
Also GOD BLESS AMERICA;)

As this week comes to a close and the final full school week approaches it is a mad dash to finish last minute projects, extra credit assignments, and essays. While my fellow classmates are gearing up for spring fest (a weekend extravaganza full of underage drinking and concerts) I will be heading to DC for my birthday weekend!!! Having to make sure that all my assignments were finished ahead of time proved to be more of a challenge than I thought but nonetheless I am ready for a relaxing weekend away from the fast pace world of college and NY!